2 Days, 3 Books

CS Lewis quote

I packed three books to go to my parents for the weekend – really it was more like a 30 hour trip. I went to help out after my dad had a series of small strokes that followed a severe stroke a couple years ago. My mom is his caretaker. Is is a lot.

Before I left I checked the fifth Harry Potter book on audio out of the library for my daughter. She’s seven and loves audio books. Since I introduced her to the literary crack that is Harry Potter she’s been flying through them.  I knew she was worried about me. And I knew if she had an audio book she was into she could squirrel herself away in her room and get lost in  a story.

My mom calls it defensive eating -when we eat not because we’re so hungry but to prevent being hungry later on. (Did I mention we’re Jewish?) Anyway, sometimes I practice defensive library use. I check books out to avoid being without one at my fingertips.

I brought the following books:

You’ll Grow Out of It by Jessi Klein -a re-read but one that is light and smart and makes me laugh.

American Street by Ibi Zoboi -my current YA fiction read. The story of Fabiola who emigrates to the US alone to live with her Aunt and cousins after her mom is detained.

Astrophysics for People In a Hurry by Neil DeGrasse Tyson – because I’ve never read anything by him and I heard him talk about it brilliantly on the radio. And because sometimes it’s good to get distracted by things that are a lot bigger than you are.

I didn’t pick up a single one -okay maybe a few pages of You’ll Grow Out of It before bed, but that was it. But I knew they were there. I knew if/when things got hard or painful that those books were there for me. I’m not a religious person but I imagine this is how it feels to have that kind of spiritual faith.

When I open the pages of a well loved book I know that the words will be in the same order they were before, that the plot will arc in the same direction. When I read something by a trusted and loved author I know I am investing myself in something that could show me the interconnectedness of all things, or a world wildly different from my own but that resonates with me emotionally.

“We read to know we’re not alone,” is a quote often attributed to C.S. Lewis but there’s some controversy around that. I’m not surprised I’m sure it’s one many people have said or thought. I know I have.

The Importance of Representation

You can know a thing and not really know it. I knew representation was important. I knew it’s important that Doc McStuffins exists and that baby dolls come in all colors. But I didn’t really get it until it changed the way I thought about myself.

This week I was teaching a unit about genetics and in doing so was discussing the meaning of the word “generations”. I did this on two different days. The first day, my slideshow featured these images:

Generations 1

There were no unexpected or unusual comments as we discussed the meaning of the term. The next day as part of a review, my slideshow featured these pictures:

Generations 2

In two of my classes there were comments from the male members of the class. “Where are the boys?” they wanted to know. One student even went so far as to say, “Hey that’s discrimination.” He was joking, but that’s hardly the point. The boys noticed when they were absent. They noticed when there were people in the pictures who didn’t represent them. They noticed, and they complained.

The girls, when looking at similar pictures, said nothing. They did not think it was strange to look at pictures representing a term that should include them but didn’t. Their absence or lack of representation was not a new or unusual thing.

I thought about writing a post like this after I watched the first few episodes of Girls, starring Lena Dunham. I loved the awkward and uncomfortable way she portrayed sex. But after the first few episodes I realized it was more than that. I loved watching a woman with a less than pencil thin body being portrayed as a sexy and sexually desirable being. The character of Hannah Horvath is in many ways an awful human; self-centered, narcissistic, etc. But one of my favorite scenes involved her riding her bike down the road in her bikini. When one of her friends suggested she put on some clothes she dismisses the idea, claiming that she’s in a beach town.

The humor in this scene doesn’t come from the fact that she’s hanging out of her bikini six different ways. It comes from her own delightful lack of self-awareness and social mores. It’s funny because she doesn’t care. I didn’t realize how much I liked watching someone with an actual human-looking body on TV until I saw it. I’m embarrassed to admit how much watching a TV show has made me feel differently about my own body. And I’m equally embarrassed to admit how much I didn’t really get about the importance of representation until I did.

There’s a fantastic organization in the kidlit world called We Need Diverse Books. I’ve followed their progress in social media but now I understand their mission in a new way. It’s not called “Diverse Books Would be Nice” or “Diverse Books Would be Helpful”. There is a need for diverse books because of the way representation can fundamentally alter the way we see ourselves and envision our future. If seeing Lena Dunham parade around in her altogether can change the way a 40 year old woman thinks about some very entrenched ideas about body image, imagine the possibilities for kids seeing themselves in the pages of books and on TV as doctors, lawyers, ninja super heroes, rock climbers, athletes, professors, and so on. The possibilities are truly infinite or at least they could be.

 

The Importance of Friendship

amy-poehler-2

I became a mother almost 7 years ago but it took my daughter’s first sleepover with a friend to make me really feel like “a mom”.

The sleepover itself was smooth sailing. Lots of giggling, pizza for dinner, more giggling, extra cookies, giggling at a movie that as far as I can tell was not a comedy and then more giggling before passing out a good hour after bedtime. All standard stuff.

It was a really weird feeling to be the one creeping up the stairs only to hear the giggling stop. But this isn’t a post about getting older or getting more mom-like, it’s about friendship. Because what I didn’t expect was how teary I felt watching my daughter and her friend create this world that is just about them. This was an extended look at a relationship she has with another human that has very little to do with her parents.

I never doubted my daughter would have friends. Both of her parents are pretty extroverted social people. Our community of friends is like a second family for both of us. But there’s something about seeing those relationships form that made me grateful, both for her friends and mine.

The book I’m currently writing/revising is considered middle grade fiction; the protagonist is eleven. And the theme of the book (kids get your pencils out) is the importance of friendship. The main character has a tough family, but learns that his friends can hold him in the world much like a functional family does.

There are a lot of young adult and middle grade books about romantic relationships because adolescence is the age of discovery as far as what those bits and pieces mean and do. But discovering friendship and the role it plays in our lives is equally important and the lessons last well into adulthood.

As a side note, I’m exhausted and now understanding why my parents were never quite as thrilled at the idea of a sleepover as I was.

Resistance and Rage in Period 5

Oh look, I’ve neglected my blog since early November….like many of you I felt sucker-punched in early November. The rise of Voldemort has left me feeling rather lacking in the words department.

In the last few weeks I’ve felt more consistently angry than I can ever remember feeling. I have felt torn between wanting to run out and join whatever guerilla revolution would have me, and wanting to hide with my kids in a blanket fort. Guerilla revolutions offer full health and dental coverage right?

I’m afraid to continue with my life as though things are normal and yet I’m struggling to know how best to resist being squashed by the pavement roller of patriarchy and oppression that is rolling across our land.  I’ve always felt like the work I do as a middle school teacher is less about kids learning science and more about kids learning that there are lots of different ways to be a healthy functioning adult in the world. But right now that doesn’t feel like enough. I suppose I feel more helpless and powerless than I ever have in my life before. It’s kind of scary to stand in front of a class of 13 year olds when you’re feeling that way about the collective future of the country.

I’ve been told that tomorrow during our school-wide viewing of the inauguration “personal emotions/beliefs/views will not be communicated/shared”. I understand this in theory; no one wants Ms. Kaufman to launch Dumbledore’s Army during 5th period, and yet there is so much about this that is troubling. I don’t want to be passive and accepting. I want to channel my rage into something productive, into something that makes a difference and I want my students to know the importance and power of resistance. But mostly I want my students to know that 3 million more people in this country voted for love and acceptance over hate and division. I want them to know that this is not a “normal” election even if it is a peaceful transfer of power. I want them to know that what they do with their lives matters so I guess I have to practice what I preach. 

 

Totally normal

Totally normal things authors think when their agents take more than 24 hours to return an email.*

*My agent is a wunderkind who never takes more than 6 hours to get back to me. But, if say an email were to get lost in the shuffle…..

  • She hates me
  • She hates what I wrote
  • She is in the middle of negotiating a really important deal for someone else
    • I will never get important deals because I suck and shouldn’t ever have gotten her as an agent anyway.
    • Everyone has better deals than me
  • She thinks I’m too needy
  • Am I too needy?
  • I bet her other clients aren’t this needy
  • Was my question dumb?
  • Maybe I can google the answer
  • Maybe I should add dolphins or an amusement park to the ending of my book
  • I bet her other clients write about dolphin-themed amusement parks
  • There is probably a huge dolphin-themed amusement park book about to be HUGE any second now.
  • Shit, we’re going to miss it.
  • *Sigh*
  • *Hits refresh*

No Excuses

It’s been an insane 6 weeks since the book launch party and I’m very sorry not to write this sooner. Between crocheting my kids Halloween costumes and cleaning the baseboards it’s been rough. Okay really just regular life stuff but it’s nowhere near as good as the image of me crocheting anything.

Here is my favorite picture from the book launch party at Mechanics Hall Library.

tweens-signing

I’m really hoping none of these children read my book before they’re in high school or at least that they have very permissive (preferably Unitarian or reform Jew) parents.

It was a blast. I’m so grateful to everyone who came out and made it fun and special. So thanks! I know I have more pictures somewhere but I can’t find them so here is a random pic from high school.

high-school

By the way, I so knew this picture was being taken. This is just me being cute and pretending to be surprised. Also, these white v-neck t-shirts were a major wardrobe staple for longer than I’d care to admit.

If you’re in the Boston area and you have a lot of anxiety the night before the election please come join me and 3 other amazing YA author friends to talk books at Porter Square Books in Cambridge November 7th at 7pm. Love to see you there.

Porter Flyer.png

Happy Birthday to Wired Man and Other Freaks of Nature!

Book Cupcakes

Thanks to everyone for their patience (Lauren MacLeod, I’m looking at you) and support (friends, family, twitter and Valerie Cole you’re all over it)!

I hope all of you local folk can make it out to celebrate next Friday night! More details here.

In the mean time here is a list of things you can do to show your love and support for AUTHORS IN GENERAL (not just me-really)

*Buy books – I know, duh, right? But seriously I don’t have an endless budget for books or a house big enough to store them all. But when I love an author, I buy their book. Also books make great gifts!

*Ask your local library to get books by authors you love.

*Write reviews of books you love on sites like goodreads and amazon -seriously, this can make a HUGE difference. Even a short review. Books with more reviews get promoted more on those sites.

*When you go into a bookstore -ask the employee where the book is. Even if they don’t have it this helps spread the word about their title.

*Social media is great for learning about new books. If you love something, let people know!